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haven blogged for decades..

okay there.. i lied.. for 1 week mayb..
and STOP acting!!

i have been obsessed wif reading harry potter recently.. and i think the book seriously ROCKS!
i cant stop reading it till i reach the end.. and when i reach the end i wanna start all over again.. told you i am obsessed..

and i am hell broke can.... no money to eat.. ='(

sigh.. so this is poverty...
seriously.. too many projects, too little time to rest, relax and sleep and always stretching to the limits..
we are starting to receive the toll of all this.. yan is falling sick.. serious headache today.. and
EVEN pepsi did not cure her..

in the blink of an eye, last match of polite is coming.. and.. we must win...
i hope i do well.. =(
i totally sucked this season.. and i hate it
sorry ppl..

and i think i sounded random in the entire post.. cos theres jus too much things to say and too little time.. and most of the things i wanna say, i forget..
but today i have learnt.. tt playing out of the comfort zone actually does not refer to playing physically out of zone.. but comprises mentally and flexibility and agility and watever as well.. so there thats comfort zone.. and i think i finally understood wat it meant.. heh..
i must try it nxt match..

and the biggest challenger is actually one self.. always..
and i wish i can stop thinking about u nerd! cos i hate you...
please dun m ention the word project in front of me.. i think i will go berserk..
yup... blogging indeed makes you feel better.. as if regurgitating.. phewu~

Labels: i seriously wanna eat chocolate

sorry mates.. if any of u happens to read this..
i really wasnt tolerant..
sigh.. i will change...
yup sorry.

so the key is to play out of my comfort zone..
and thats wat i shall do..

today is sunday.. waking up in the good weathered ( raining ) morning is a torture.. lols.. the weather is really wooHs.. den wanting to confirm the trg wif coach, i stay at home at wait for her to pick up her phone.. zzz no recept can.. i was like.. fainted.. till we all decided to go trg.. den i leave my hse..

argh.. reaching sch there was only like 8 or 9 ppl.. so in the end coach arrived and say we dun train le.. go eat breakfast.. so we dine at swensens... heres a group photo.



i really do feel bad for eating the most.. BUT main point is " dun waste food ma" lols.
damn! size of these photos are real big.. took a long time loading!

2jie' s crayfish pasta.



lighting is no good..
and being too tired, we jus shop around for 30 mins or so den went home.. lol
i slept like a log for 3 hours..

and good news.. khai kit is working.. we saw him today for his first day of work.. lols.. funny~
good luck to u ass! work hard.. earn more money and TREAT me makan =)

and YTD, we went to queue for dounts.



looks nice right.. THEY were ALL FOR ME!!! alone can.. lols..
thats cos i got no one to queue for la.. kns!

and this is 2jie refusing to get shot.. and i wonder why.......







i hope my pics are not too big and can be seen..
haha... last note i miss my "bf".

Labels: damn we could have secured a THIRD place at least..

hmm... todays results 63 - 55, combine ITE won by 8...
how shall i describe the way i am feeling now..
angry? hatred? disappointment?

we could have won.. really...
god is SO unfair...
damn...

wats the reason we lost??
haha wif more den 10 3 points scored we still can lose. OMG...
kill me can??? please....

jus because..... sometimes i really cannot take it...
are u thick? or stupid...
every chance i gave to u, u jus proved further to me tt i am right.... dun blame me....
fuck you!!
i wish we could change strategy....

sigh dun even think about it... god is unfair.. because i shall explain when the season ends...
theres still chance... buck up.

Labels: u COST me one game.... note COST

projects projects and more projects.. i can nv seem to finish them.. argh.. after those projects are exams.. wa lau.. how to manage... kns...
today i really choing till i feel like dunno whether to cry or to laugh.. OMG..
its such a terrible feeling..

even khai kit wans to kill me instead of helping me do project.. haha.. its seriously torture to him..
thanks to melvin, my cousin's bf and bryan for helping me follect the surveys!! hahah save alot of my time man!! goodness.. i willbe better off dead i guess.. woahh..

trgs is not tired.. but i feel my ankle giving me signal.. lol.. its been swollen for like 2 days le.. =(
i better tape it.. =( bloody hell...
games tml...

can i dun do projects?? =(

i look forward to yr msges..
i look forward to chatting wif u..
i look forward to you..
haha i jus miss you...
u know?
haha it seems like L

AH BLACK'S [C O N F I D E N C E]
FLASH~ [C O N F I D E N C E]

WE ARE CONVINCING OURSELVES TO BE CONFIDENT.
lols.. so i heard about his team...
everything in life is hard..
we need to learn how to cope.. and grow..
anyway its fun~

regarding my "bf"
1. hes too nice to reject offers.
2. hes too noob to get hints.
3. hes a jerk.
4. hes afraid.
5. he dunno.

argh i dunno either... its weird.. and i always hate this kind of guessing game.. i cant stand it... lols..
class is fun today.. cos of a small ball.. we have to catch it in order to answer questions.. and the ball i throw accidentally hit nurul's face while she was trying to catch it..

anyway i hate the IB test later.. cos its 25% anyway.. get it over and done wif.. first paper on 17 aug.. 2 weeks after polite ends.. i guess i have time.. AND there is no IB paper... so i MUST PASS WELL!!

yeap... argh.. tired.. cosi slept at 3 and wake at 7... trg laters... games on fri and i cant wait.. to perform.

Labels: morale HIUGH

haven been blogging cos i simply have too much things to do.. weet.. collecting my spects later...

me and da jie ( but i thought i am supposed to be the da jie!! )

told u my hair looks stupid... darn tt aunty.. =( but i found ways to make it look better.. lols.. jus plain lazy to dress up..

i dunno wat happened but my leg hurts.. and its hurting for 3 days..~ ass.. i go do stretching okay.. it better recover soon..

wee... 5 days to polite.. and i think i am beaten by projects.. kill me.. i cannot meet those deadlines..

today is sat! had a great day.. ;) wif the mate.. finally i get to rot wif them.. heh.. after trg i watch my all time fav harry potter... =) woots and chuen sat beside me... the main point is chuen sat beside me!! =)

i wanted to blog photos.. but i forget my photobucket pw and user.. lols.. so for today's photos please go to www.this-is-grace.blogspot.com =)

ohh i so feel like shitting now.. yeah!!! got our jerseys today.. promise to post them soon.. ima gonan rest..

WARNING: this entry may sound nonsensical.. so if u arent prepared dun read it..

B4 i went to sell of my old handphone, i wanted to write down the memories i kept in this hp..

first of all.. coach motivating to stay focus on trg.. asking me not to be so sian.. last 3 weeks to go..
thats cos we train 7 days a week... and i told her i feel sian.. haha~ ima bastard..

den its qi jie wishing me merry xmas, ar ka liao wif me

lols.. and chuen.. u remmeber tt journey msg?!?! dang... i cant keep it anymore.. but i will remember.. haha.. sadly cant threaten u wif tt anymore.. u remember...
if u were to set off in a long and dangerous journey.. blah blah..

and its qi jie again.. askign me to take care cos i fell sick... erm those rest well, drink water stuff..

and den yun.. forget all bads and play like theres no tml.. thats like b4 the semi or finals.. some pep talk thingy.. 15 players 1 coach 1 spirit.. thats wat i call a real team.. well shall not bored u wif my yet another elaboration.
and again yun asking me to have confidence.. i train so hard.. i got to show ppl what we have got..

and its qi jie again...!! wishing me good luck for the finals.. waiting for my good news..
oh and qi jie apologising for not being able to attend the mahjong session.. lols.. he actually said sorry 3 times... for fear tt i am angry...
den about the malaysia trip which nv happened.. and his work..
and him feeling damn upset and down.. cos of the IVP games.. he told me he hated himself.. and at tt time i felt so.. ERM.. and him thanking me..

oh~ and yawen's msg after semi.. lols.. tt girl fell sick and did not play well for semis.. luckily we won sia... saying she will play her best on tues which is finals..

and si hui's good luck msg.. saying we will win.. hey thats all about games and teams right.. we all wanted to win.. and syaing we will win way b4 the actual game.. =) i miss those memories and feeling..

and its qi jie again.. consoling me after we lose the game..
once he asked me .. whether is the result that is impt or the process.. and i told him its process... so while i was sad to the max, he reminded me of my answer...

and den jing hui.. telling us how proud she is of the team.. my dearest captain... sad.. i cant keep this msg.. =( at tt time i feel the proudest i have ever been.. being thankful and happy to be in the same team as us... goodness.. i know its the best team..

so its qi jie agn... further consoling me about the lost game.. fuck it we shouldnt have lost..

and coach.. in the morning checking if i am alright.. die alr not jus the day after finals... lol.. i am her xiao lao hu leh~~ siao siao.. so i thanked her for all the things we have achieved wif her being our coach.. and she jus said its our team efforts.. hey without her we wun be team in the first place..

and its qi jie telling me to ice my ankle.. cos of a stupid sprain..
and qi jie.. telling me to stay whr i am he come and find me in case i get lost..

and den grace.. on my birthday.. haha telling me she was apprehensive about me being the cap.. but i earn wat i have.. tt touched me can.. cos i thought i sucked all the way.. i am prepare to sucked.. but i still wanna try my best.. and hey i finally did earn my respect..

and its coach.. encouraging us captains.. to jia you.. cos not everyone can be.. and if thers no challenges ppl will be all complacent.. afterall its about enjoying the process...

i know the above seemed like rubbish.. which no one would understand.. haha but they are for my reference.. if u cant understand its okay.. so to conclude from the msges i kept, most of them are bball related... now i understand y ppl say bball is a part of my life.. it is...
sigh.. too bad i lost my 7610.. the second saddest moment of my life.. its jus not fated to be i know...

no mood for ANYTHING right now..
no dependence..
no skills..
no talents..
no luck..
no support..
no nothing..
no life..


fucked up to the max.. i hate it RIGHT now....
becos i got to finish my GSC tonight

i can nv describe this heart breaking sensation.. tell me who will understand..
when i know wat u told others and wat i told others..
when u know the truth and when i know the truth...
its so damn fucked up..
why cant we pass this obstacle..
this bloody obstacle.. which cost us 2 yrs...

2 long yrs of ultimate fun, anger, sadness, hatred..
you are the guy which i first tear in front of.
you are the guy which i feel most at ease wif.
you are the guy i only wanted to be wif.

10-7-04
3-7-06

too used to u.. too close wif you.. couldnt have wish more than anything..

Labels: i lose a gf becos i play too much MS

i am angry wif u to the max!!! asshole...
how can u forget me. ..

trg was okay today... heh.. i only run one 4 ze.. cos miss free throw.. argh.. damn!
this is seriously getting to make me worry... injuries.. we cant afford anymore injuries..

and for those who were alr injured, recover asap please...
and for those kicking and alive.. please protect yrself well.. dun get injured...
polite jus round the corner yea~

and damn.. i need to go jogging and gym by myself alr.. too weak.. soon!! cos its jus 10 days away~ ohhh~

i dun have depression Grace.. i think.. jus need the anti depression drug to make me go further.. =)

shouldnt have been the case..

wat a tiring week cum day... tired to the max.. i dunno how long more i can take it...
but i hope nxt sat i can get a off day.. so tt i can unwind and pei my frens and play like finally..
i wan to club again.. i wan to go BBQ and i wanna watch movie... dang!! so many things i wanna do but no time, no money and no one accompany..

but harry potter is out nxt week.. heh!! chiong!!
and FTT also nxt week.. i haven study...

anyway i met my new colleague today.. hes not as handsome as kelvin and chelsea describe to be.!!

conclusion:
today is a bad day cos there are 2 injuries.. YL and jas.T
this week is a bad week.. cos i got the chance to go to taiwan for OBS camp but i fucking give it up.. simply becos no one pei me go!! dang dang dang!!! once in a life time sia!~ i dulan to the max!!!

i certainly need you..

i wanna cry and i wanna die...

wif the fugly hair..
and so much work.. and no rest.. i jus cant take it.. sometimes...

and i need u to let me lean on.. for like 5 mins. can? haha.. ultimately i am still a strong girl..\

ya.. fucking tired.. yet again... i wan some rest time...

so so much things to do.. haha let me complain can!!.

many a times i wondered if i were selfish or too demanding towards others.
but when i place myself in their shoes, in tt situation, i would expect myself to fulfill my promises.

wats the point of making promises u cannot fulfill or make den break them..
i dun understand.. wouldnt tt be a breech of trust..
define trust.
define good frens.
define sincerity.

or tell me straight away my expectations are too high for u to meet!!

it will be better for all of us as i wun expect anything from u and u dun have to feel the pressure.

poeple were all brought up in different ways. and the way we are is shaped by the way we are brought up.. and i was brought up by coach cindy. fair enough arguement if u are not brought up in the same way.. but some times if u have made a mistake u could at least have LEARNT from it.. isnt it the basics of being a human being...

if u dun learn i dunno wat to say about u.. u are not my fren.. not fit to be.

so much for trying so hard to be nice to u and be yr good fren.. i give up..
and lastly.. sorry are for mistakes done accidentally, unintentionally..
wats the point of apologising when u have done smth wrong, knowing it..

its hard to be optimistic when the truth is often shoved upon yr face..
but this does not mean i dun hope for a miracle..

i was telling this to charlene while we talked about my bball team..
one word.. sigh..

haha i dunno wat this sigh means.. but its meant alot of things... which only a few could have understood..
fucked up to the max..

wat should i do now...

today the seniors came back.. yawen, xiu hui, jing hui, cheryl and fany.. haha!! i still could read their play.. i still can undersand wat they wan.. and i am happy to the max..
in my entire 7 years of bball... i have nv felt tt good playing and training..

but now.. its the worst team i have ever played in.. i hate to say this but its the truth... even my sec sch team has not been this lousy....

i dunno wats wrong but i jus hate this feeling.. of knowing u will lose..but not becos of u

eating at hawker centers could be fun!!
this is newton circus after its renovation.. and i say food there is ex to the maX!!

cute little tortise adopted by ME!! aha... given by pau jin kuang.. cos his sis bought it for him and its too girly.. so wanted me to rear for him..

not bad de k.. the stats for the tort is:
HP-1000
defence-1000
attack-800
speed-100

haha.. its a tort after all..
i enjoyed myself ytd and today... and i miss u chuen... u better fucking miss me too!! hahah or esle....

i am so dead cos my effective writing project chui to the max.. zzz fuck it!!

Labels: i dunno wat is this feeling i have for u