ME. kynzgerl
CODES. manikka
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The 2 paper heart: moargh.de
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yeah... im finally like meeting yiwen... YES YES YES!!!

IVP Basketball
venue: NTU-NIE Press Hall
9 Oct (Tue) 8.45pm NYP vs NUS
11 Oct (Thu) 8.45pm NYP vs NP
12 Oct (Fri) 7.30pm SMU vs NYP

what will i be doing after these?
Hahahhahahhahah its hilarious.
i guess presently its a bad period for us...

if you give me one chance to tell you how i was feeling
i would sing to you and tell you i wont live my life without you.
if you give me one chance to tell you how i was feeling
i would hold your hand and look in your eyes
and you know i will never let you go.

as days passes by i felt better and slightly more cheerful..
finally being able to let go is a blessing. =)
haha thanks yiwen for listening to my whines..
and being worried about me...
most of the time i slept my day through..
but sleeping nv failed to prove to be a waste of precious time.
its time to face it.. =)

ytd i went to parkway.. i ate a marcademia nut flavour ice cream and its yummilicious.. but i still prefer haagen daaz macademia nut ice cream.. haha nicest!! and i wan it.. like soon... =) craving for macademia nut ice creams.. weets.
i shopped around and saw a mango dress which I LIKED! lol and its yellow in colour.. so cute!!
and i see tt you really are working hard.. =)
mayb things are jus NOT meant to be.. like i said.
after tt i fish and co-ed.. ew.. NV try mermaid freeze.. its a mixture of carrot and mango.. the carrot is EW la... i regreted not ordering sharkie freeze or jungle freeze.. LOL
anyway.. today i HAD my much craved for laksa.. yummy.... since i came back from overseas i had craved for it.. woohoo~ and i had tou hua zui..

haha... weng lisheng finally passed his driving test... like for the 8th time if im not wrong.. such a waste of money lo.. i can get 2 license with tt amount of money le la. haha dun laugh at him okay.. yeah.. good life seh.. im lucky too...

AND tml im going bugis shopping wif chuen chun li.. haha.. shopping... and its the first time shes buying smth and im accompanying her.~
weets.. =)

private life, double life.
shouldnt it be fun and interesting if i were to have a double life..
haha yiwen. you should cross over to the DARK side.!

zouk next wed.. anyone?! lol...
i was jus thinking about the things you can do/be and yet be undiscovered by other ppl around you.
hmm.. examples like having :
- one night stands.
- cyber sex.
- anything in the world.

hmm and they can be not related to having sex. hmm.. like:
- having a psycological illiness - undiscovered even by oneself.
- being bullimic, aneroxic
- having a secret interest.

wow.. im lazy to think of more examples. but den.. there really can be a long long list.. its scary or cool?
imagine having something which no one else in the world knows about.. but aw.. sg is so small.. its hard to keep thing such as a secret life.. you are bound to bump into someone u know.. lol im lame..
but hey it got me thinking okay..
and i think im crossing over to the dark side.

haha and i think i broke myself inside out. i dunno and cannot be bothered to explain.

LIFE has got such meanings... so much tt i failed to discovered any..

Labels: can i stop learning but we NV stop learning.

thank you yiwen for calling me at 340.. thus woke me up today..
i wonder y am i sleeping so much..
LOL... its really scary...
what happened to me... aw~

i decided to watch the surprise screening at GV singapura nxt tues if we dun have training. haha!! and i think i will be watching alone... cool..
and i wanted to watch joshua too... phycological thriller... I LIKE eh~

counting down, 2 more weeks to IVP... yes.. im excited.. =)
last night is lantern festival.. LOL.. did i mention ivana asked us to play wif lanterns after training and it was really v fun! lost childhood la.. and i decided that i did not have enough fun. thus i called my neighbour.. and we played at our hse downstairs till 2am... LOL.. it was lame.. we competed against each other. see who could build the longest candle by combining the candles and we burn paper.. and we collected wax in a box den in the end burn up the wax...
its so lame la.. but fun.. im glad we enjoyed ourselves..













oh ya and coach treated us to dinner... weets.. beef hor fun.. FAV... super yummylicious..

i feel so discontent. unfulfilled. fucking lame...
LOL..
really... because i have been rotting at home everyday till nearing evening den i will head out either to work or for trainings.. its so meaningless..
3 more weeks to endure..

and WORSE... it took me so damn long.. like till now.. erm that is like 3 weeks. to realise that its NOT going to happen... i wished i nv met u.. i wish i nv fell in without thinking..
and damn.. its not yr fault.. cos its ALL mine!!
shouldnt have messed wif u in the first place. right.

i shouldnt have let myself be weaken like tt.. and i was always wrong.. always.. and i dun understand why...
when can i be finally right..
i know i should be going.. it will be the correct thing ...
=)

its painful can.

Labels: and i need my best fren

i feel so fucking useless. becos i dun have a driving license...
damnation... i dunno y i suddenly feel tt way... aw!

i swear i go and get my PDL this thurs... haha and register for TP! kns...
abit dulan loh... cos i haven register.. sian to the max.. F***

hahahaha... stupid license.. make me feel so argh~

is this the end?
i really wanted to know..

and curiosity kills the cat

the camp has ended... and THATS the last camp i will have in NYP... aw... anyway... its also the least fun camp... cos the boys jus simply cannot be bothered to tell me they wun be coming till the day itself... zzzz

anyway the girls were rather great... im glad ppl turn up.. haha! mayb i jus didnt realise during the last camp that its so important for ppl to turn up!
well as usual.. i learnt alot of things that are hard to use word to express for me.. i hope i will always remember them. and not forget. cos i jus dunno how to pen it down.

and aw.... we forget to take picture as a team.... zzz haha and the only game we played was the angel and mortal game.. zz thanks elaine!

im having a fucking pain stomach now has has been bearing wif it for days.

this is my SELF PROCLAIMED bf. =) i really liked him.
but however there is this thing in the past which he cannot let go of. and i dunno wat is it.. i dun feel like guessing anymore..
and i wun wait for him.. will i??
hes nice and all tt.. but hes jus afraid and lack the confidence to leave the past behind and embrace his future wif open arms. i hoped i could have helped him. but den i dunno how.
i guess i will jus fuck care... aww...

will be back from the camp on sunday.. more juicy details den..
i hope he comes back to me

results are out.. and i didnt fail any... but den it sucks..
lols... walau!! i cant be bothered le la... SIM here i come.. at most apply study loan to study there.. zzzz

kanasai!

okay la.. i dun feel sad nor happy.. cos i simply registered the fact that my result SUCKS!

aw anyway... i feel like eating yuki yaki... yiwen said she went and she tempted me la.. marina square... super feel like eating tt loh~
AND i want to view the light show... named songs of the sea - recommended by yiwen also.
and i was wondering if i should buy basketball shoes... cos mine is simply too slippery le.. and if i buy they will be used for this IVP and thereafter i dun even know if i still will be playing basketball.. thinking about it makes me sad.. aww..

i mean i played basketball for like 7 years already... =( i guess its the longest thing i ever done... nvm~ i dun excel anyway..

good news.. my hell of a bf is ignoring me again!
its damn sian.. i dun understand.. ( let me rant - lol )
if he cannot comit den jus tell me ba..
i hate waiting for him to reply my sms.
hate waiting for him to contact me..
i feel most of the time hes MIA either out wif his frens or playing games..
but tt doesnt mean he can like totally cut me out.. i dunno how to explain.. argh.. mayb i demand too much from him..
i really did think.. mayb hes not used to being tied down or watever.. but den when i asked him he jus says mayb or give non commital answers.. haha
i wondered if i should let him go.. since i aint tt happy.. y not.
bah! i feel better already.. i dun need him anyway....

wtf..
sibei dulan!

sinking into duper bad mood..
for no reason.

i am so not happy and so pissed.
sometimes you jus makes me wonder if i ever made the wrong decision.
damn!

back from the trip.. can say it was fun because the people there made it fun..
haha all from the adventure club.. and one from NYAA.
but.. it was hell torturing.. goodness...
spent 3 days climbing up and down one mountain. although the view was really superb, but i jus dun have the mood to appreciate after being so shagged..
and all the while i jus hope a helicopter would come and pick me up...
but den in the end i reach the bottom of the mountain wif my own pair of feet..
and it was help muscle ache all the way after the climb. LOLS..

the best part of the trip is the resort at lombok.. hahahah... SHIOK sia.... if i could i would go there again... the resort i mean...

this trip is 100% challenging... lols.. as i had no mountain climbing experience b4, i didnt have the sufficient mental preparation.. haha all i could say tt i was weak willed and i stilll prefer to be the da xiao jie at home... lols..
i am lazy to post pics for now.. but might in the near future.. =)

thank god i am still alive... its damn dangerous there la! no safety ropes or locks can!

this week pass by in the blink of an eye.
serious~
fucking tired can.. everyday slp only like 4 hour son the average.. EVERYDAY!
and now got this headache.. which i guess is from the heat this morning... damn... we ran like crazy zzz that is during trainings...

anyway.. will be away the whole of next week.. to tt trip. like finally a get away. and hope its not tough... i have been rather confident.. but the tiredness makes the confidence go away if u get wat i mean..

and the packing of the stuff haven been much of a breeze cos i seriously LACK so much things... i almost went crazy...
but hope all will be fine... please pray hard for me... tt i survive and come back in one FULL piece..

this weeks i watch 2 movies..
the rat show - wif yan jas and YQ.
its damn funny and nice... recomended to watch!!
weeett. and outting wif them is FUN... we wolfed down a billy bombers meal each b4 the movie.. =)

second movie
1408 - wif jin kuang
its not nice one loh... kns.. abut confusing.. i tot it will be a hit.. if i had known i would have choose to watch 881.. argh.. what a regret.! but nvm..

hmm been spending much time wif jin kuang this week like 2 days.. haha.. which is not bad hor! i feel.. its enough..
cant really remember wat else i wanna say and jus wanna complain tt i am damn damn damn tired.. and trg really nv give chance.. zzzz *prays*

well miss u guys.. till im back. =)

Labels: mount rinjani